Monday, December 28, 2009

Monitoring Appt - Confused and Upset

So Christmas has come and gone way too fast, which seems to happen every year. But this year I knew once it was over I could look forward to my second IUI...the one I most certainly thought would do the trick and get me that 2010 BFP. But of course with all things IF, things at my monitoring appointment did not go as expected...and completely ruined my positive outlook.

Today was cd 14, which looking back now seems a tad late for a monitoring appointment. But last cycle I went in on cd 13 (also a Monday), and this cycle I started clomid a day late so I thought nothing of it when the nurse told me to come in on the 28th. So this morning bright and early hubby and I headed downtown to the dr. office. We went in the for the ultrasound and she said I had two large follies on the right (instantly I'm thinking oh YAY maybe I'll have more than 2 this cycle), but turns out my left ovary wimped out and only had little guys. I asked for the measurements (something they didn't offer up last cycle) and she said 29 & 23.

Not having done much research on follicle count, I immediately thought this sounded great and was relieved to have 2 again this cycle. So fast forward to now and I'm catching up on some blogs and read one about someone having a follicle similarly sized to my large one and her RE stating it was too big, or overripe to fertilize. Cue my complete freak out, and insane googling of follicle count and size. It seems online there is a consensus that anything over 25 is considered too large. That's not saying they won't still produce an egg, but it's not the ideal size of low 20's.

So my frustration is, why didn't they have me come in on cd 12 or 13. That is what my RE mentioned we would do when I originally met with him. I know they're opened on the weekends, so did they think they were doing me a favor by pushing it to Monday? Because now I just feel like we wasted the whole month, and assuming my 23 follicle grows another 2 mm....i may end up with 2 overly big follicles by the time of my IUI tomorrow. I'm just so bummed because I feel like I had to fight to even cycle this month, and now was that all wasted. Like hubby said, they're suppose to be the experts...but why does it feel like we have to keep checking up on them? And don't even get me started on what I found online about super big follies being cysts...which leads to next worst thing to happen which would be sitting out next month. I know I'm getting way ahead of myself, and maybe that 23 follicle is just fine...of course I don't know anything because I'm still waiting to hear back from my nurse who I promptly called at 9am begging her to call me back and discuss all this.

I probably being over dramatic about everything, but this morning when I woke up I was so positive about this cycle...and with one swift kick in the ass I feel like the whole month was taken from me...and instead of wondering if I'm pregnant the next two weeks, I'll be wondering if that huge follicle will be the cyst that keeps me from cycling again next month. Ahhhhh, can my nurse just call me back already!!! Would appreciate any comments from people who know anything about follicle I totally out this month?


Anonymous said...

Its really hard and google and stuff can be your best friend and your worst enemy... and I for one had never heard about folli's being too large.

I hope i hope your doc has got back to you and let you know the deal. stay strong.

Shanny said...

I've read about people saying their doctors have told them follies over 26mm can be too big, BUT, I've had some really big ones of my own and my doctor never seemed concerned. When I got the guts to ask, he said it was normal for clomid/iui, not so much for stims/ivf. Especially because they not only check the follies but also the estrogen levels, so combining the two factors... he said it was fine. Not sure what to think myself :-/
Either way, good luck!

APlusB said...

Sorry I can't offer much advice since I've never had this kind of monitoring. Keep your head up, though. And, as hard as it is, sometimes we just need to trust our doctor